“Are you sure we have to pass through the gates to get to the city?”

 

“Well, technically, we could pass over the gates, but, damn! I left my airship in my other cloak.”

 

“You didn’t tell me the city was guarded by vorpal bunnies.”

 

“Bunnies? Are you nuts? Those are serpents. See the scaly heads and the bodies that flow back, and the slitty red eyes?”

 

“I see the red eyes, of course. Clever the way the stone is chipped away just so. Just to let the light of the city shine through.”

 

“Pretty sure that’s not light from the city.”

 

“Well, how would you know?”

 

“Because everyone knows the stone serpents’ eyes shine with the light of Hell. Only the truly pure of heart may pass between them.”

 

“Pure? You? That’s hilarious. Why just last week you had two of the serving girls from the tavern sharing your bed.”

 

“I said pure of heart, you idiot. Anyway, the angle of the sun is wrong. That can’t be light from the city.”

 

“Oh. Well. There is that… You don’t really believe in all that hellfire nonsense, do you?”

 

“Oh, gods, no. Sounded pretty cool though, didn’t it?”

 

“Yeah. Well. Except for the bit about the bunnies being serpents.”

 

“That again? How do you even see bunnies?”

 

“Well, look at the soft noses and the super-tall ears.”

 

“Huh.”

 

“What?”

 

“I suppose they could be bunnies.”

 

“Told you.”

 

“Does it matter?”

 

“Well, no. I mean really, they could be serpents, bunnies, or the tits of Queen Matilda. We still have to pass between them.”

 

“Yeah. True…. So, how much longer, you think?”

 

“Hard to say. Objects carved in stone are often farther away than they appear.”

 

“Oh. Okay.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Well, it’s just that I have to pee.”